Saturday, October 3, 2009

Mixed Feelings

I'm just having a lot of mixed feelings right now. I think that too much is changing in my life and it's taking me a minute to get used to it all!

A close friend is making life a little complicated, but in a good way. It's nice to actually have friends. I've been friendless for a long time and I really missed having someone to talk to and hang out with. Shawn is my friend, of course, but I can't go complaining about him to him, ya know? My only real problem is that I don't have girlfriends. My friends are all boys. My best friend is a boy (fortunately, Shawn's not the jealous type). I just relate so much better to guys than I do to girls; it's not a real problem, I guess, but it would be nice to have a close girlfriend.

I think it's that girls are mean and complicated. Guys seem to be so much more "this is me, take it or leave it" and are more open and honest. I can deal with that and appreciate it (even if it's annoying sometimes). I just can't deal with the way so many girls my age are. Not all are like that, but enough that it makes me not want to even try to make friends.

Anyway, that's one thing. The other thing is work. I started at Barnesville today. I was so excited earlier in the week, but it really hit me yesterday... I won't be working with my friends anymore. I know, I'm a manager and they are employees... fraternization isn't good. I agree with that. BUT, I spend most of my time with these people and they are the same age as me, so they aren't "just" employees to me. I really care about them and hate not seeing them everyday. It was a little sad to say goodbye. But, I realized that I can still see them whenever I want (and I won't have to see the witch anymore!).

Barnesville is DEAD. I remembered that it was slow, but I didn't think it was this slow! We're trying to find things to do, but you can only clean and straighten so much, right? It's a huge change and is kind of nice, but I see myself being bored a lot. Maybe I can sneak in some knitting time...

I kind of wish that I were back at Fayetteville, but I think what I'm really wishing for are the people I worked with. I guess I just can't be happy with what I have, huh? Really, though, I think the transfer was a good thing for me; I just need to adjust (something I'm not good at).

Anyway, that's about all I have right now. Not much knitting has been happening around here. Moma and I are going on the Shop Hop Monday (we hit up 10 stores and each spend 10.00 at each one to be put into a drawing for 1000.00 worth of giftcards (100.00 from each place) and other prizes). I can't wait for that.

Plans for tomorrow... a run, dropping off my keys at Fayetteville, lunch with Chris (the best friend), working to about 2215 or so, then off to hang out with some people from Fayette. Can't wait to get the work part over with since I'm off Monday and Tuesday.


lunaticraft said...

I often feel the same way about being friends with girls our age. It can just be so difficult and passive agressive sometimes! If two guys get into an argument they take their shots, take their punches (sometimes literally) and just get it over with and everything's fine. Girls our age love to let it linger and fester. I'm very much the "just take the punch and get it over with" kind, and I get along so much better with guys too.

Good luck at the new location!

MJ said...

I have always gotten along better with guys too and that hasnt really changed as I have gotten older. Guys are just more straight up and what you see is what you get. Women can be so petty and catty. That doesnt really change that much as you age, either. So hang in there and just take it one day at a time, things will work out just fine.